I am one. I was born one. It’s not my fault. But that qualifies me for the government incentive of doing this meme, so yay me! Thanks to Tense for again giving me a meme to do!

Do you wear slippers?
Yes.

How many pictures are in your living room?
Zero. All my pictures are in storage or packed in a suitcase at the apartment.

Do you wear a bra to bed at night?
Not usually.

Do you ever watch Brady Bunch reruns?
I have done that on occasion.

Are you allergic to anything?
Fleas, dust, the sun, lactose, some sort of pollen, cat dander, and rules.

When was the last time you called in sick?
I could stare at my calendar and figure this out, but I don’t remember. I know it’s been within the last 6 months, but I don’t do it very often.

Have you ever been in a car accident?
Several. None of which were my fault. First one was at age 5 when a tree and some ice decided they really liked my mom’s car.

What is your favorite snack food?
Chips? Chips.

Do you think you have a big butt?
I love my butt. I have no idea if it’s big, but I think it’s beautiful.

Would you like to look like your mom when you are her age?
My mom is beautiful, but I want to look like me.

Have you ever seen a tornado?
Yup.

Do you think Barack Obama is sexy?
I don’t walk around thinking that, no.

If you won a million dollars, what would you buy first?
A place to live for me, Dawg, and the girls…

What time is it right now?
11:17am.

Are you pregnant?
I’m pretty sure I’m not. Otherwise this crankiness is all for nothing.

Have you ever been pregnant?
Not that I’m aware of, although the stretch marks on my tummy like to pretend they have. :smiles:

Do you like men who wear pink shirts and flip-flops?
Um. I don’t dislike men specifically for wearing those items…?

How many pairs of shoes do you own?
Two, plus one pair of slippers. Oh, and a pair of heels I’ve never actually worn.

Do you think you are a hypochondriac?
Sometimes, which is why I try not to go to the doctor unless something perpetuates for a couple/few weeks.

Do you own a dictionary?
Yes.

Where was the last place you went on vacation?
Manhattan.

Do you talk about your friends behind their backs?
Yup.

Are you actually fat but in complete denial about it?
What kind of rude-ass question is this shit? Fine, I’ll be completely honest. I’m 5’4″ and fluctuate between 146 lbs and 154 lbs depending on time of month and life circumstances. When I am 146 lbs everybody freaks out that I look too thin. My body is happiest at 154 lbs. I don’t care if it’s fat or not fat, that’s where my body wants me to be. So, suck it, meme creator, ya skinny assed skanky bitch. (See? I can be judgmental too!)

What color is your mouse pad?
Invisible.

Does your kitchen have a theme?
Old.

Do you like to mow the yard?
Yes, yes I do. I just don’t have a yard to mow right now.

Are you addicted to using Febreze?
No. I have a bottle of it that just sits untouched under the kitchen sink. I kinda don’t like the smell of it, actually.

What is your ring size?
7 (Actually, it might be 6 now, or 6.5. My fingers used to be bigger.)

When was the last time you consumed alcohol?
I know this one! Um… at Brittcon, I think!

Do you know someone who gets food stamps?
I don’t think that I do. My mom got them for a tiny bit when I was a kid and she first divorced my dad, but… hmm. I dunno, no one else advertises it to me.

Do you have a basement in your home?
I live in it. :smiles:

Are you still in love with one of your exes?
No. There is one ex I’d do “anything” for if he asked (such as let him crash on the living room floor in my home or give him money), but he hasn’t asked in the last 15 years so I’m going with the assumption that he’ll never ask. No particular reason for my loyalty other than he was the first boy to ever love me.

Any big plans for the summer?
Um. Yah. :smiles:

What is your favorite comfort food?
Tacos.

Do you prefer broccoli or asparagus?
No. :smiles:

What color are your bedroom walls?
Light blue, as painted by the landlords.

Whom do you live with?
The kitties, for now.

Which Star Wars movie is your favorite?
Episode IV.

How about Harry Potter?
Um. I guess the first one.

What was the last movie you saw in theaters?
WALL-E.

Did you get the popcorn or the candy?
Popcorn.

What is the most romantic text in your inbox?
:} Let’s just say it melts me into a puddle on the floor and leave it at that.

Have you ever played miniature golf on a date?
Yes. Wait. Yes? Yes. Hmm. I LOVE MINI GOLF!

What’s a word or phrase you overuse?
Just.

Where do you buy most of your shoes?
Land’s End. BOOTS.

Do you always use good grammar?
No, and sometimes intentionally not.

Do you have an accent or a speech impediment?
We all have accents, duh. I started developing an “S” lisp before I got braces, which kinda sucked since my name starts with S.

What did you eat today?
*tummy grumble*

What do you do at work?
I protect princesses from Evil.

Do you know the rules to any sports?
Yes.

Do you prefer to watch or play sports?
Depends on the sport.

What is your favorite kind of hat to wear?
A baseball hat.

Do you pray?
No.

Whom do you pray to?
I wishfully think to whoever needs it.

What is the closest mountain to your house?
Uh, do “Mounts” count?

When is the next time you will move?
I’m moving by the end of the month whether I have a place to move to or not. Lease is up at the end of the month.

Isn’t there something better you could be doing right now?
Isn’t there always…

Is there anything good on TV?
By my definition of good: Yes.

Does your significant other have a MySpace?
Yes? Although I don’t think we’re Friends there, hehehehe.

What is your dream marriage proposal?
Uh. Err. Wow, that’s uncomfortable. Honestly, this is not something I think about. I like surprises.

What are your nicknames and who gave them to you?
Poppy was given to me by me. Aside from pet names that Dawg calls me, the only other nicknames are family given: Stef and Steffie.

How often do you wear jewelery?
Never? I’m ok with rings, I just don’t have any. (No, that’s not a hint. It’s the truth.)

What size engine is in your vehicle?
Um. … Big?

What do you need to do tomorrow?
Hmm. Well, see, the fun thing about being me is that I don’t need to do any anything tomorrow, but I’m all responsible and shit so I’ll at least feed the girls their Fancy Feast treat.

Whom do you hope never to see again?
I would rather not answer this question.

Which friend of yours lives the farthest away?
That would be April. She lives in Germany with her husband who is there on business for the foreseeable future. I miss her now that she’s farther away than Arizona.